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I will not waste chalk
I will not aim for the head
I will not skateboard in the halls
I will not barf unless I'm sick
I will not burp in class
I will not expose the ignorance of the faculty
I will not instigate revolution
I saw nothing unusual in the teacher's lounge
I will not conduct my own fire drills
I did not see Elvis
I will return the seeing-eye dog
Funny noises are not funny
I will not call my teacher `Hot Cakes'
I will not snap bras
Garlic gum is not funny
I will not fake seizures
They are laughing at me, not with me
This punishment is not boring and meaningless
I will not yell
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